Germany and Austria – Our {Rough} Itinerary

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I can count on two hands the number of days left before we board our flight to Munich. To say that we’re excited is an understatement. Eeeeek. Earlier this year, I wrote about how we chose our big summer vacation. And last year, I really enjoyed writing about how we chose our adventure and our rough itinerary, and recapping our time in the Cotswolds, London, and Paris. So I figured I’d give a brief overview of what we plan to accomplish during our time in Germany and Austria and how we plan to incorporate lessons learned from our trip to Europe last summer.

Munich. We scored an amazing deal on roundtrip tickets to Munich so we’re bookending our trip in the capital city of Bavaria. We initially considered incorporating Berlin into this trip but ultimately chose to focus on southern Germany and Austria in order to really experience the scenery and culture. Yes – we will be sure to visit Hofbrauhaus, Marienplatz, Frauenkirche, and more but we’re just really looking forward to wandering around the city and seeing where each day takes us.

Salzburg. After our initial stay in Munich, we’re renting a car and driving to a villa on the outskirts of Salzburg. We will stay there for a few days and explore both the city and countryside. Yes, we will be doing a Sound of Music bike tour and will have no shame singing Do-Re-Mi in Mirabell Gardens. We hope to visit a lake or two, we’re looking forward to hiking Untersberg, and of course eating our way throughout the city!

Edelweiss Lodge & Resort. We had already pretty much mapped out our trip when we received news that Edelweiss Lodge & Resort changed the eligibility requirements back to those stationed outside of EUCOM. We were able to score a few nights at the resort so we will be heading back into Germany after our time in Salzburg. We plan to relax during this portion of our trip and leisurely explore the countryside and visit Neuschwanstein Castle and other famed Bavarian sites. And I am almost positive we will fall in love with Garmisch-Partenkirchen and will never want to leave. We will also be in town for Garmischer Fest so we will be able to experience a true German festival.

Munich. We are ending our trip back in Munich and will have a couple of days to explore more of the city before flying back home.

What We Are Doing Different This Year

More time. Due to Clay being an aide-de-camp at the time, he was only able to take a week of leave. We made the most of our 7 days in the United Kingdom and France but because of our tight schedule, our days were packed and we were exhausted by the end of the trip. This year, we will have more time and we will have more opportunities for rest and relaxation.

Less guilt. This ties into the previous point but we are not going to let ourselves feel guilty if we want to have a quieter day that doesn’t involve running from landmark to landmark in order to maximize our time. Clay and I have trouble relaxing but we are going to force ourselves to have a few hours of down time built into each day – even if it means eating a leisurely meal or sitting in a park and letting the kids play while we sip drinks.

Listen to Rick Steves. We love watching his show and reading his books so we have no reason not to follow his advice. His travel philosophy is simple and we will be sure to be fanatically positive and militantly optimistic during our trip.

Those of you who have been to Munich, Salzburg, and/or Garmisch-Partenkirchen, what do you recommend?

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The Art of Being Bored

Categories Year of IntentionLeave a Comment on The Art of Being Bored

How can it already by the second week of July? School starts back up next month. Next month. How is that even possible? My elementary school summers were spent in Phoenix, Arizona. Perhaps it was the unrelenting heat, but the almost three month break from school seemed to last for.ev.ver (said like Michael “Squints” Palledorous from The Sandlot).

Me – circo 1990 in Glen Arbor, Michigan

Back then, my summer days involved countless hours in our swimming pool, one massive road trip to Michigan, and day trips down to Mexico. I had very relaxed summers growing up. My mom stayed home and we didn’t do day camps, classes, or any other scheduled events that seem to dominate kids’ schedules nowadays. We’d go to the library and Video Showcase, where each of us kids were able to rent a movie on $1 Tuesdays – discovering such films as Mac & Me, He Said/She Said, and my beloved Three Men and a Little Lady. And yes, I was bored – some days more than others.

Thank goodness.

The art of boredom is dying – especially among children. It is alarming the amount of children who are rarely given the opportunity to fully use their imagination and fill empty time with self-created adventures. Perhaps I am more cognizant of this trend living in Northern Virginia – the pace of family life in this part of the country really can feel relentless at times.

I purposely do not fill up our summer days with activities and outings. Yes – we still do quite a bit and my children experience plenty but they also have quite a bit of days with absolutely nothing scheduled and they’re left to their own imaginations for entertainment. Yes – they use the iPad and watch plenty of television but they’ve built an entire city out of LEGOs in the basement, they created a vending machine out of a giant cardboard box, they worked together and wrote a book, they designed a scavenger hunt, and they play outside plenty. Most importantly – they’re learning how to self-motivate and work together as a team.

The internet has no shortage of articles about why bored is good for the soul. Study after study have demonstrated why unstructured time is crucial for childhood development and psychological well-being. I admit there are times when I doubt my instincts and wonder if I am doing enough for my children this summer. But then I am reassured when I’m called down to the basement to marvel at their newest invention made out of BBQ skewers and Play-Doh.

We have plenty of family adventures planned for the rest of summer but there will also be a lot of down time where they will harness their boredom and transform it into independent creative play. They will draw. They will paint. They will make a mess. And they will clean up after themselves. I will not comb Pinterest for activities to keep them occupied day in and day out. They will have time to think. Time to plan their own day. They will play outside unsupervised. They will build forts. They will fight. They will be sent to their rooms. They will read. They will be bored at times. And they will have a fantastic summer because of it.

An Overnight Getaway in St. Augustine, Florida

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Last year, I wrote about the importance of vacation without kids. Now that our kids are elementary school-age, we’ve been keeping our non-kid getaways limited to overnights and weekend trips because we’d rather take them on our big trips! So when my parents offered to watch the kids for a night while we were visiting Amelia Island a few months ago, Clay and I jumped at the chance to sneak away. We chose St. Augustine, Florida because it is a short drive from Amelia Island and it has a completely different vibe than the surrounding area.

Casa Monica Resort and Spa

We decided to stay in a hotel that we wouldn’t have chosen if the kids were with us. We’re big Marriott fans so we booked the Casa Monica Resort and Spa, which is part of Marriott’s Autograph Collection. It was built in 1888 and served as a hotel until the owner abandoned the property when the stock market fell – it officially closed in 1932. From 1968 until the 1970s, it served as a county courthouse. In the 1990s, it was sold again and officially re-opened as a boutique hotel in 1999. It’s in the heart of the St. Augustine historic district so it was the perfect location for our little getaway.

We arrived at the hotel mid-morning and we were able to check in early. We dropped our bags and set off in search of coffee and to explore the cobblestone streets. Founded in 1565, St. Augustine lays claim to the oldest city in the United States and boasts the nickname The Ancient City. The brick-lined streets have a distinct European flavor and there is no shortage of centuries-old buildings, hidden courtyards, or vibrant fountains.

We popped into some shops and enjoyed strolling through the alleyways – the weather couldn’t have been more perfect. Soon after, the pool was calling our name so we headed back to the hotel. We sat in a cabana, ordered drinks, and enjoyed reading our books without children demanding our attention.

While in the cabana, we researched places to eat dinner and made a reservation. After getting our fill of sun, we changed and set off to explore some more and grab drinks and appetizers since our dinner reservation wasn’t until much later that night.

The Casa Monica lobby is filled with Moorish-Spanish decor, frescoed fountains and ornate chandeliers. The hotel is beautiful and full of the charming quirks that often accompany historic hotels – a maze of hallways, tons of scones, and unique pieces of art scattered across the property.

Super close to the hotel is the Cathedral Basilica of St. Augustine, which is our country’s first parish and the oldest Catholic Church in St. Augustine. We visited the sanctuary and admired the exquisite murals and beautiful stained glass. We then set off to stroll the cobblestone streets yet again.

The live music at Mi Casa Cafe drew us in so we ordered draft beer and enjoyed the shaded patio and eclectic crowd.

We then had chips and guacamole and another round of drinks at Taberna del Caballo. Pictured is the caipirinha I ordered, which is one of my favorite drinks to order when at the beach. Made with cachaça, a rum-like spirit from Brazil, lime, and muddled sugar, the caipirinha is a simple and refreshing cocktail perfect for a sunny afternoon.

We explored for another hour or so before heading back to our hotel to change for dinner. It was amazing to leisurely walk around at our own pace (we’re fast walkers!) and not have to take into account the needs of our children.

The sun was setting as we set off for dinner so we decided to walk along the water. St. Augustine is located on the Mantanzas Bay, which feeds into the Atlantic Ocean through the St. Augustine Inlet.

We also walked along the exterior of Castillo de San Marcos, the oldest and largest masonry fort in the continental United States. We watched dolphins frolic in the Mantanzas Bay and the sun set to the west.

We had dinner at Collage, which is up there as one of the best meals we’ve had in a long time. We were not disappointed and enjoyed the award-winning experience of dining there. We can’t recommend it enough!

If you do find yourself in St. Augustine and dining at Collage, do not hesitate to order the Bougainvillea dessert. It is a perfect combination of fresh strawberries, fresh vanilla ice cream, phyllo dough, cracked pepper, and mint.

The next morning was filled with more exploring and walks along the water. We decided to head back up to Amelia Island a little sooner than expected in order to squeeze in as much beach time as we could with the kids because the weather forecasted later that week wasn’t greatest. We had an absolute blast in St. Augustine and can’t wait to go back with the kids when we’re back in the area.

What is the ‘Widow’s Tax’? How Surviving Military Families are Denied Full Benefits.

Categories Military3 Comments on What is the ‘Widow’s Tax’? How Surviving Military Families are Denied Full Benefits.

We’ve all heard that freedom isn’t free. But for over 65,000 military families, neither is death. Kristen Fenty, the wife of my husband’s first battalion commander, LTC Joseph Fenty, has been tirelessly advocating for years on behalf of other military spouses who are being denied their full survivor benefits because of the so-called ‘widow’s tax’.

LTC Joseph Fenty was killed in Afghanistan just 21 days short of being retirement eligible – he served nearly 20 years before giving the ultimate sacrifice for his country. Kristen and Joe’s only child, a daughter, was born one month prior to his death. I’ve written a lot about that deployment – it’s appalling to know that surviving military families are being denied benefits they rightfully earned. As Kristen said back in 2012, “It’s infuriating to think that something my husband earned is not going to his family. It demeans his service.“

What is the military ‘widow’s tax’? The issue lies with how the government deals with two separate military survivor payouts – the Survivor Benefit Plan (SBP) and the Dependency and Indemnity Compensation (DIC) program. Under the current system, surviving family members (e.g. the ‘widows’) who receive both the SBP and DIC end up having their SBP reduced dollar for dollar for the amount they receive in DIC, regardless of how much the service member paid into the SPB during their career. An estimated 65,000 families are affected by this offset.

What is the Survivor Benefit Plan (SBP)? According to the Department of Defense, the SPB “allows a retiree to ensure, after death, a continuous lifetime annuity for their dependents. The annuity which is based on a percentage of retired pay is called SBP and is paid to an eligible beneficiary. It pays your eligible survivors an inflation-adjusted monthly income.” Simply put, the SBP is a form of insurance.

What is the Dependency and Indemnity Compensation (DIC) program? According to the Department of Veterans Affairs, the Dependency and Indemnity Compensation (DIC) program “is a tax free monetary benefit paid to eligible survivors of military service members who died in the line of duty or eligible survivors of Veterans whose death resulted from a service-related injury or disease.” It is commonly referred to within the military community as the ‘death benefit’.

Wait – so military families are encouraged to pay into an insurance program only to be legally prohibited from collecting it should the unthinkable happen? Yes. Current federal law requires survivors to forfeit part or all of their purchased SBP annuity if they also qualify for the DIC program. As a reminder, the DIC is for eligible survivors of military service members who died in the line of duty or whose death resulted from a service-related injury or disease.

Is this a recent development? Sadly, no. Advocates for the repeal of the ‘widow’s tax’ have been fighting Congress to fix the loophole for decades. The military’s “widows tax” does not discriminate against age, race, creed, or branch of service. It is simply a way for the government to squeeze more money from military families once their service member has either been killed in action or has died from a service-related injury or disease.

Kristen Fenty and her daughter on Capitol Hill in 2008

What is being done about it? Due to the tireless efforts of survivors and advocates for the elimination of the ‘widow’s tax’, legislation has been introduced in the past four Congress sessions (2011, 2013, 2015, 2017). Unfortunately, despite having significant sponsorship, it continuously failed to even receive a House vote.

It has never even made it to a vote? Seriously? What about in 2019? Currently there are two pieces of legislation with sponsorship – the Military Surviving Spouses Equity Act (H.R.553) in the House and the Military Widow’s Tax Elimination Act (S.622) in the Senate. Both proposed pieces of legislation have bipartisan support and would eliminate the provision.

So what happened on the hill yesterday? Senator Doug Jones (D, Alabama) stood on the Senate floor before the vote on the annual defense authorization measure in effort to add a repeal of the ‘widow’s tax’ (see video below). He called for unanimous consent to force a vote but Senate leaders wouldn’t allow it as an amendment in the National Defense Authorization Act (NDAA).  Senate Armed Services Committee Chairman, Jim Inhofe (R, Oklahoma), and one of the 74 co-sponsors blocked the parliamentary move over financial questions and other anonymous objections. The Congressional Budget Office has estimated the legislation would cost approximately $5.7 billion over the next decade. Senator Inhofe stated, “I support and will continue to support the permanent fix. It’s going to happen. We’re going to do it … but it can’t be on this bill.”

What happens next? Despite advocates having fought to repeal the widow’s tax for years, this is the first time it has garnered this amount of attention in the general public. Senator Jones said yesterday that he has talked to House leaders in effort to bring up the bill in that chamber and that he will continue to fight on behalf of Gold Star families, whether it be as a standalone measure or as an amendment on an existing bill.

Kristen and her daughter in 2019

What can I do to help? Contact your representatives and urge them to support measures to end the ‘widow’s tax’. The Military Officers Association of America (MOAA) has a form that you can fill out to send a message through it’s Legislative Action Center. Use the hashtag #AxeWidowsTax when tweeting about the issue. Inform your family and friends about the issue. And don’t forget to say thank you to the members of Congress who have expressed their support.

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